Wednesday, December 7, 2011

Beware the Recipe Chain!

Here it is, a few weeks before the big holiday season, and in pops an email about a Recipe Exchange from the mother of one of my best friends. Now, I don't know if was before my 2nd cup of caffeine, or after a particularly satisfying breakfast that made my brain complacent, but at the time this seemed like a mighty fine idea to follow the instructions and send a recipe exchange request to 20 of my friends. After all, I need to go to holiday parties, and I might just end up with the killer savory ricotta fritters as an appetizer or bring a tasty Apple Cinnamon Crostada to the brunch. When I heard recipe exchange, this is what was pouring into the inbox in my brain.

My first recipe that arrived was painfully simple, and seemingly includes an illegal amount of sodium, and was probably a favorite of every kitchen in Main Street USA circa 1961:

OK, as it was the first one, I did not make any judgements. I am also fairly positive that for a million dollars, I cannot identify what CHUCK ROAST is when I go to the grocery aisle with all the meat in it. (they really should have pictures of what the stuff looks like cooked so I can ID it). It sounds like a big piece, versus the wavy meat they call hamburger.

The second recipe pops in, with an attachment, and the email reads:

I do not like clams, and I did not open this email.

Still, I was not officially discouraged, after all, I've gotten 2 out of many many amazing recipes to come my way, come on Number 3!

Later that evening, all hell breaks loose when I get this one. I even threw up a little in my mouth while reading it.

I am a veritable well of optomism when it comes to food, so I will be waiting patiently for other fantastic treat instructions to arrive. My goal is to actually read something I would consider making, versus making me lose my appetite. My neighbor's mom always made ambrosia in that huge glass footed bowl, it was great when you were under ten years old.

The hard thing for me is that the only food I have ever made is not one I read about in an email, but one I sampled at a party, freaked out, and begged for the recipe. I am publicly admitting that these recipes in this exchange have a very low chance of ever seeing the light of my oven. At least they see the glory of cyberspace as they are posted here for all to read. If anyone wants the clam recipe, please say so - however, I'd recommend reading Poor Girl Gourmet (the blog or the book) by Amy McCoy for actual real yummy food on a budget. Bon Appetit!


Kate Cotter said...

This is hilarious. By the way, roasted vegetables is one of the easiest, yummiest things to make...cut, pre-heat oven, add olive oil and pepper, and roast. My standby!

Dawn Haley Morton said...

NOTE - I have not gotten any further recipes from the RECIPE CHAIN. However, I did get a request to take part in another recipe chain. (sigh)